Dear Porkchop: How do I write a lede?

For the answer, we turn to Garance Burke of the Associated Press:

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STRATHMORE, Calif. (AP) -- On Grandparents Day, Domitila Lemus accompanied her 8-year-old granddaughter to school. As the girls lined up behind Sunnyside Union Elementary, a foul mist drifted onto the playground from the adjacent orange groves, witnesses say. Lemus started coughing, and two children collapsed in spasms, vomiting on the blacktop.
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All right, so maybe it's not a perfect example. After all, I hear you say, that lede is so badass that you don't really care what the rest of the story is about, and I rather agree.*

Still, you've got to admit it grabs your attention. In fact, I want to chant it over an instrumental break in a prog-rock song.


*Apparently it's about pesticide.